This week, I did a free write from the tip of my tongue, top of my head, and bottom of my heart. Hopefully you read it and get where I'm coming from.
Look over the cliff of existence, she stands below--so far below. Sense the grief in my words as I spill my heart on top of her. She looks up to me, but looking down is all I seem to ever do. Understanding isn't her trait to hold. No, judgements cross her lips more often.
The skies stain scarlet, my eyes turned gray with the lack of sleep. If she's not the one, her face says differently. That smile...those eyes...they keep me awake at night, pacing and turning like a dancer caught in a loop. Bewitched as I must be--judgemental as she has become--still I stand upon this cliff, ready to jump. Jumping into another line of thought would prove fairer, but the beating of my heart contradicts reason. It contradicts life itself. Thump wump. Thump wump. It beats so hard when I'm around her, yet she cannot hear because she's stuck below.
I'm gazing at what I'll never have. Let it be my last sight! These eyes are tired and delusional, cut by the knife that shapes time with morbid thoughts. I could be ended right now with the smile on my face. Love isn't actualization but knowledge that I could do no better. I'm ready to dive, dive into her. She stands so far below, but all I wish is to be on her level--stand by her side.
Carpe diem et provehito in altum