"Only a Dream"
"Hey Johnathan," Lauren said with a smile.
"Hey there," I smiled back at her warmly, letting the background of the busy high school hallway fade to gray as I focused more on the glowing beauty that was Lauren's face. She was only slightly shorter than me back then, and she had the type of long, brown hair that a guy doesn't forget easily. Standing out even more though was her deep hazel eyes that always seemed to illuminate whenever she wore the same cute smile she had worn that day.
For as long as we had started talking casually, I had liked her in a way that was significantly more than a friend. was never sure why I liked her so much, but there was...just this sort of "aura" around her that caused her to stand out. In my mind, she shined even brighter than any of the other girls who faded in and out of my everyday life.
Looking back, I can't quite remember the exact words that had fallen from her lips in the conversation that had started with a "Hey" and a smile. I truly wish I had have paid more attention to those words, made sweeter by the sound of her voice, because it would be the last complete conversation we'd have.
When I came to school the next day, Lauren wasn't there. The following day was the same situation, as well as the next day. I becan to get worried about her, especially since she wasn't answering any of the text messages or calls I'd been sending to her cell phone. Finally, I resolved to call her parents and ask them what was going on.
"Hello," the middle-aged woman said on the other line, "who is this?"
"Hey, ummm.... This is Johnathan--"
"Oh, hey Johnathan!" The woman's voice became lighter, more friendly. "What can I do for you?"
"Well...Lauren hasn't been to school in a week, and she isn't answering her phone."
"Well, of course," she stated matter-of-factly, "she's in the psych ward, they don't allow her to have any elctronic devices." My heart stopped. I could feel the air rush from me as I tried to grasp the reality of Lauren's location. "You still there?"
"Oh...yeah. I was just a little surprised, that's all...Well, thanks for the help."
"No problem, have a good day."
"You too." She hung up, leaving me to wonder about all that was happening.
The next few weeks were a blur, and I can only remember them in pieces as I learned about the exact location of the psych ward. The next clear memory I have is stepping out of the elevator on the second floor of the "ward," which truthfully looked more like a furnished hotel lobby than a medical facility. That's when I saw her. She was dressed in a dark green hoody, with a sad expression on her face.
"Lauren!" I yelled. She made a double-take and stared at me in surprise.
"Johnathan?" she answered back. "You're not supposed to be here..." A slight depression seemed to envelop the tone of her voice. It surprised me, and, for a moment, I couldn't think of anything to say. That's when she turned to her left and began to walk swiftly towards a hallway to my right.
"Wait," I protested meekly after her. Her walking pace turned into a sprinted, and I ran after her. "Lauren, wait up!" She turned into a room to her right. I entered the room soon after her. The entire room looked like a suite-sized college dorm. I watched as Lauren ran into a room up ahead. I attempted to follow her, but my way was blocked by three of her roommates, all girls, who stared at me confusedly.
"What do you want?" one of them asked.
"I want to talk to Lauren," the words flew from my mouth before I could think them.
"What if she doesn't want to tlak to you?" asked another.
"Then tell her she's beautiful!" I responded without thinking and on the virge of tears. "Tell her that I care about her more than anyone! Tell her I miss and may days are nothing but darkness without the light of her smile!" The word "care" echoed through my mind, as if a part of me felt as if "love" would have fit better.
The stern expressions of the three girls in front of me melted in sympathy of my words. I started to believe that I would finally get a chance to sincerely talk to the girl I'd been chasing for the longest of times....but that's when I blacked out...
When I came to, I was at home, in my bed, with my mom hovering over me.
"Are you okay, son?" she asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine...I guess..." I then learned that a girl from a different room had sneaked up behind me and hit me with a lamp. After blacking out and being taken to the hospital, the higher ups at the ward began to question the exact reason I was there in the first place. No charges were being brought up on either side, but I also wasn't allowed to go near the ward ever again and Lauren's parents were telling both of us, separately, that it may be best for us not to see each other for awhile.
A month later, I'm sitting here writing this, wating for the day when I'll finally get to see the girl I love. But, it seems as if such a dreams are childish even more so as these days get continually darker before my eyes without the light of her smile to give me guidance.
~Alex
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