Thursday, August 16, 2012

"Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet"

Life changes quickly. It's almost unfortunate sometimes that we have to change with it. 
From friends to lovers to awkward acquaintances, back to friends and then just two people wishing for the past to come back. Changes in relationships are possibly some of the worst things in my life, especially when emotion is involved. 
Right now feels like one of those times, although I can't pinpoint why...Anyway, this next piece attempts to capture it all by playing off of my uncertainty and blending it with some Fall Out Boy lyrics. 

"Lovers" by Slagophoto

“Pete Rose”
(It's a story about cheating. Get it?)

            I walk into the room. You’re splayed out on the couch, begging me to come closer. “C’mon,” you whisper, “have a taste.” You lick your lips and the universe leans in to catch my response.
            “Sounds delicious,” I state with a smirk. Give up on conscious thoughts. I’ve no need for my brain. All I want is to become closer to who you are—lie closer to you. And so I creep closer. I straddle you and cuddle you. Like a drug addict, my conscience must’ve gone out the window with the intoxicating feel of your lips against mine; the alluring smell of that perfume you shower in before each of our meetings.
            My mind’s stuck on the possibility of getting inside…inside that mind of yours. But I swear I wouldn’t…I shouldn’t…I couldn’t…I can’t seem to resist your charm. Your naked body against mine. Your warm breath against my neck and soft voice urging me on. All of it sends me into a fervor. “Harder…” You gasp. “I want it rough.” I attend only to your needs, for my thoughts are concerned with the longevity of this affair.
            I groan in pleasure but know I come second in this two man race for your love.
            After all, does your husband know what we do? Does he see our heated embrace in your eyes each night? Does he…Does he even know the words that could stop me cold?
            You promised he hurt you, that he means nothing,  and you need something new. Still, I have to promise myself that I’ll never fall into this trap. Oh, how I love you…I need you…I want you, but I could never end up like him. Although, probably, behind my back I already have…
            Now you sigh with that layer of sweat upon your skin. No doubt you’re now thinking about him… “That was great!” you exclaim with a smile before thrusting once more oh so teasingly. A smile is drawn upon my face with the ecstasy held tightly between our loins.
            A car door slams outside. “I thought you said he wouldn’t be home for another few hours,” I start with terror.
            “I…He wasn’t supposed to be. I don’t know what’s going on.” Fear enters your eyes as you hand me back my clothes. “Here put these on. I’ll distract him while you sneak out.” I know the routine, but it always stings to hear it come from you each time.

            “Tempest in a teacup” for lack of a better phrase. The chaos that follows reminds me of a race to escape death. “Jess! I’m home!” your husband yells in the next room over. The way you clean up…You’d think he’d suspect something…Why be with someone so dense, hun? Why…Why…Why…Have you ever thought that maybe you peaked early?
            He’s seduced as he comes through the door. I can almost hear the sound of his fingers sliding against your soft skin, his lips colliding with yours. It makes me sick. Does he even understand what’s happened? Can he guess the words that I long to hear?
            No, he can’t…How could he understand our love when he doesn’t even know I exist? And, so, I creep out the back, wondering if it’s all worth it.
            I swore I wouldn’t end up like him. Yet, in a sick, sad way, I already have. You cheat him for me but still cheat me for him. Just know that I’ll still be here. (I’m not going anywhere.) But next time be sure to keep a calendar—this way you’ll know the next he’ll come through. No matter how long it takes…Oh, darling, just know that I understand what you’re going through.

Fate drives me.


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